Death Promise (1977)

How can one movie be so bad, yet so watchable at the same time?, 30 August 2017

A group of Fat Cats has their eye on a couple of buildings that they'd like to level and redevelop. The problem is that the buildings are home to several dozen people. The Fat Cats decide to do what they can to force the tenants to leave – turn off the water, attack residents, release a box of rats, etc. When everything else fails, the Fat Cats approve the murder of the tenants' leader. But Charley Roman isn't going to sit by and let his father's murderers go unpunished. He takes the law into his own hands and uses his martial arts skills to exact revenge.

How can one movie be so bad, yet so watchable at the same time? Death Promise really tests my notion that I rate films primarily on entertainment value, because everything else you can name about Death Promise is bottom-of-the-barrel. Pathetic acting, horrible lighting, lazy one-take direction, ridiculous plot, bad make-up, silly dialogue, "stagey" fight choreography, a "twist" ending that should surprise no one, incomprehensible lapses in logic (more on that later) – Death Promise has it all. One of the more annoying facets of the film is how the title – Death Promise – actually relates to the film. After his father's death, Charley Roman engages in an ongoing conversation with his dead father where he "promises" to avenge his "death". This monologue happens at regular intervals for at least half the film. Silly doesn't begin to describe this plot device.

However, despite all the flaws, Death Promise still manages to be surprisingly watchable – if not entertaining at times. What's Death Promise got going for it? First, they may not be real actors, but Charles Bonet and Speedy Leacock seem to know their martial arts. Their kicks, jumps, and punches look authentic. Second, I know it's unintentional, but the bad guys are so clichéd, they end up being a real hoot. I had more fun watching this group than I could have ever hoped. Third, Death Promise has a really cool bow-chicka-wow-wow soundtrack that worked on me. Gotta love these 70s films. Finally, Death Promise falls solidly into that "so bad it's good" category. I never like using the phrase, but it applies here. Considering the good and the bad, I think my 5/10 rating seems about right.

I previously mentioned incomprehensible logic. Well, here's what I mean. BIG TIME SPOILER Charley Roman wants revenge for his father's death. His martial arts instructor, Master Shibata, advises him to seek out some special training from another martial arts master. Charley Roman returns home more ready than ever to face his father's killers. How absolutely illogical is it when we discover (and it's no real surprise) that Shibata is the head baddie? So, Shibata sends Charley Roman for more training so that he can return to face him. What? How does that make any sense in the slightest? END BIG TIME SPOILER

5/10