Combat! "Any Second Now" #1.4 (1962) (TV)

My second experience with Combat!, 16 June 2006

In this episode of Combat!, Lt. Gil Hanley (Rick Jason) finds himself trapped under rubble in a church. Atop the rubble sits an unexploded bomb. It's up to a burned out British bomb disposal expert with a hatred for Americans to save the day - and Lt. Hanley.

The only thing I've got to compare "Any Second Now" with is "A Day in June", the only other episode of Combat! I've seen. So, that's just what I'll do - compare the two. "Any Second Now" doesn't fair well. Where "A Day in June" featured an interesting band of guys, each with a chance for some screen time, "Any Second Now" focuses on one of the shows two leads, Jason's Lt. Hanley. And this episode suffers from it. Yes, this episode is well written and contains some decent drama (although it's predictable drama), but without the other characters, the fun is gone. I missed the guys. Even co-star Vic Morrow is only around for a couple of thankless moments.

I'm not saying it's bad, it's just not as good as the "A Day in June". I just hope that the rest of the episodes are more like "A Day in June" and less like "Any Second Now".

6/10

Combat! "A Day in June" #1.11 (1962) (TV)

My first experience with Combat!, 16 June 2006

Combat! originally aired the year before I was born. Over the years, I somehow never had the opportunity to see show, so this was my first experience. I'm glad the DVD set begins with "A Day in June" as the first episode. The story of how the guys went through D-Day and on to their first mission seems to be a good starting point. While you could pick at the show's lack of realistic action or the absence of blood or the fact that the Germans are treated as little more than stiffs, but these weaknesses are more than offset by the positives. Good acting, intelligent writing, and likable characters make Combat! and the episode "A Day in June" a winner.

8/10

The 39 Steps (1935)

"What are The 39 Steps?", 15 June 2006

What a wonderful film! In this early effort, Alfred Hitchcock shows why he would one day become arguably the greatest director ever. You want mystery – The 39 Steps has got it. You want comedy – The 39 Steps has got it. You want intrigue – The 39 Steps has got it. You want a little romance – The 39 Steps has got it. It's all here and wonderfully done. And the best part, it's aged rather well. The actors speak in a natural tone and rhythm and it doesn't have that "stagey" feeling that so many early mystery/thrillers seem to have.

And talk about influential. I doubt it was the first, but The 39 Steps sets out the blueprint of the "wrongly accused man on the run trying to find the truth" that has been copied countless numbers of times. The number of films that have followed this formula is staggering. Even Hitchcock himself would revisit this formula over and over again. Why mess with a winner?

The only negative thing I can say about The 39 Steps and the only reason I don't rate it a 10/10 is my problem with the lead actor, Robert Donat. It's not that he's particularly bad, but he's just not a very likable guy.

9/10

Uno bianca (2001) (TV)

A solid modern day made-for-TV Italian crime thriller, 13 June 2006

Back in the late-80s/early-90s, Michele Soavi appeared to be the one of the few bright spots in Italy's struggling film community. But after making Cemetery Man in 1994, he seemed to have dropped off the face of the Earth. While Uno bianca is the only thing from Soavi that I've seen since his return, he doesn't appear to have lost anything that made him such a promising director. The direction and other technical aspects of the film are nicely done. Soavi obviously knows how to put together a long film and keep it flowing. At 200 minutes in length, Uno bianca is a long film. But not once during the entire runtime did I ever get bored. In fact, I was so entertained that I actually wanted more. While not necessarily groundbreaking, the cinematography and editing provide a lot of interest. There's a definite touch of style running throughout the film that adds much to the enjoyment.

Uno bianca is the story of the police's attempt to put a stop to a group of murderous robbers known as the "Uno Bianca Gang". Tired of the ineffective police bureaucracy, Officer Valerio (Kim Rossi Stuart) and his partner, Rocco (Dino Abbrescia), decide to take a different approach to put a stop to the gang. By re-interviewing witnesses, wiretapping phones, and setting up video surveillance, Valerio is convinced that he and his partner can discover who is behind the gang and stop their reign of terror. While the plot may sound similar to some the poliziotteschi made in the 70s, Uno bianca is more akin to a police procedural and lacks the over-the-top violence and outrageous plot points often found in those films. The film has more in common with the television show Law & Order than it does some of its Italian predecessors like Almost Human or Syndicate Sadists. Uno bianca is based in reality with real people carrying out a real investigation. That's not to say there aren't scenes of violence and bloodshed, but these moments remain firmly grounding in the real world.

A film as long as Uno bianca will only work if the acting is good and believable. Stuart is excellent in the lead role. He has a quiet confidence about him that works. Stuart's Valerio is the kind of character that's easy to believe in and root for. In contrast, Abbrescia plays Rocco a little more laid back and fun-loving. Still, he's no less committed to his job. He's the kind of guy you would like to have for a friend. And finally, Pietro Bontempo is perfect in the role of Michele, the leader of the "Uno Bianca Gang". Botempo gives Michele the intelligence and ruthlessness necessary to head-up a criminal enterprise. Similar to the point I made when discussing the plot, it's the realism these actors give to their characters that helps to make Uno bianca work. Good job, guys!

8/10

Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women (1968)

Unless you're a masochist, stay away from this one., 13 June 2006

Is it possible to "rape" a movie? That's how I would describe Roger Corman and Company's treatment of the Russian film Planeta Bur. Taking footage from that film and adding some terrible sequences he filmed, Peter Bogdanovich created one fine mess of a movie. Other than the nonsensical narration he recorded himself, Bogdanovich's creative contribution to Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women appears to have been the film he shot of Mamie Van Doren and a half-dozen other women lounging on the coast of California. It's so cheaply done that there is no actual dialogue as shooting sound would have been too costly (not to mention these women probably couldn't act to save their lives). This footage was then sloppily edited with the Russian film to create this dull, pointless, plot less "thing" that has no entertainment value whatsoever. I don't know when I've been so bored and ready for a movie to end. It's excruciating. I like a lot of the low-budget, no-budget films of the 60s, but I would rather have a tooth pulled than sit through Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women again. Unless you're a masochist, stay away from this one.

1/10

Sabata (1969)

- Ehi amico... c'è Sabata, hai chiuso!
This ain't your grandfather's Western, 12 June 2006

The plot of Sabata sees the title character (played by Lee Van Cleef) stopping a bank robbery only to blackmail those responsible. The robbery ringleaders don't see too kindly to this and look to take out our hero and the rest of his ragtag bunch. Sabata has everything I look for in a Spaghetti Western - good gun fights, over-the-top violence, quirky characters, some nifty acrobatics, a plot that stretches credibility, and a strong anti-hero. Another thing Sabata has going for it is a sense of humor. The entire movie is done with the tongue planted firmly in cheek. If you take none of it very seriously, it's a lot of fun. Just remember - this ain't your grandfather's Western.

Other than the better known Sergio Leone films, this may be the best Spaghetti Western Lee Van Cleef made. He's almost perfect as the killer with nerves of steel capable of hitting a target at the most ridiculous of distances. He seems to always be at least two or three steps ahead of his adversaries. The supporting cast is just as good with William Berger and, in particular, Ignazio Spalla (aka Pedro Sanchez) giving nice performances. Spalla is one of the highlights for me of all the Sabata films.

Another thing I really enjoy about Sabata is the music. It's one of the better, more-catchy non-Morricone scores I've heard. I don't care how many times I've seen the movie, I always get that theme music stuck in my head. It's a silly tune, but it works for me.

8/10

Von Ryan's Express (1965)

"A bird-colonel out-ranks a bird-brain, clear?", 12 June 2006

Von Ryan's Expess is an enjoyable enough WWII escape film, but it's far from perfect. The plot is simple and straightforward – a band of allied POWs, led by Colonel Joseph L. Ryan (Frank Sinatra), take over a German prisoner train and use it to find freedom in Switzerland. While the plot may be far-fetched, it makes for an interesting idea for a movie. The acting is good, but I don't think this is Sinatra's best moment. Regardless of what others have said, I'm of the opinion that almost anyone could have played the part of Colonel Ryan – and probably played it better. The real star to me is Trevor Howard. He steals every scene in which he appears. Locations, sets, and the use of a real train give the film a fairly authentic feel. The scenes filmed in the mountains are particularly impressive.

But, as I stated, Von Ryan's Express is not perfect. Beyond the problems I have with the story's absurdity and Sinatra's acting, the movie runs on far too long. Tighter editing, particularly early on in the film, might have made for a better film. There really isn't much going on before the escape gets underway that couldn't have been edited by about 15 minutes. Also, some of the action sequences are far from realistic. There are too many scenes where the German soldiers fall like dominoes while being completely unable to hit anything with their guns. It just looks silly.

In the end, even with the shortcomings, Von Ryan's Express is an entertaining movie. But it's those shortcomings that keep me from rating it any higher.

6/10

The Giant Gila Monster (1959)

It's unfair to compare it with the big budget movies of today., 2 June 2006

A string of deaths and disappearances on the roadways of a rural Texas town has the sheriff at a loss for an explanation. Trucks and cars seem to be sliding of the road sideways with their drivers nowhere in sight. When the local drunk reports having seen something strange on the road, he is dismissed by the sheriff. But when others report the same mysterious sight, the sheriff can no longer ignore the truth. His town is under attack by a giant lizard the size of a bus.

While I can understand people disliking The Giant Gila Monster, I think it's unfair to compare it with the big budget movies of today. Sure, the special effects are weak, but look what the director had to work with. If you look close, you'll see some talent in the miniatures used in the effects shots. Sure, some of the acting is bad, but look at the performances turned in by Don Sullivan, Fred Graham, and Shug Fisher. I get the distinct impression they were giving it their all regardless of how silly the script must have seemed. Sure, there are a lot of faults you can find in The Giant Gila Monster, but I tend to see a film with a lot of charm made by people who seem to have a love for their craft. Surely that's worth something.

I'm shocked to see that Don Sullivan only made a handful of films. I thought he was by far one of the best things The Giant Gila Monster had going for it. He seemed to be a good looking, decent actor with a nice singing voice. Why didn't he do more?

4/10

Satanik (1968)

"Something so horrible, it's inconceivable.", 2 June 2006

Dr. Marnie Bannister (Magda Konopka) is a horribly disfigured woman. When one of her colleagues discovers a rejuvenation formula, Marnie sees it as her opportunity to become beautiful. When she's denied the drug because of possible side effects, she kills her colleague to get what she wants. The drug works and she becomes beautiful. But the formula brings out the worst in her and it's not long before she's left a string of bodies behind her.

Have you ever heard the expression "as exciting as watching paint dry"? That pretty much sums up Satanik. During the film, one of the characters utters the line, "Something so horrible, it's inconceivable." I wasn't sure if he was talking about something in movie or the movie itself. I'm really disappointed because I had high hopes for this one. Satanik had possibilities, but they're never realized. At every opportunity, the plot has Marnie do the dullest things imaginable. The writing is horrible. And part of the problem is Magda Konopka. She's not that appealing and cannot carry the film on her own.

Another big problem with Satanik is the direction and editing. It's a mess. We see things and places that have no bearing on anything in the movie. The camera lingers on shots too long after the scene is over. I can't think of a single shot that would call anything but unoriginal. This group of filmmakers exhibits little in the way of imagination or talent.

I may not be familiar with the Italian comic on which Satanik is supposedly based, but I'm sure it's got to be better than this.

3/10

C.B. Hustlers (1976)

It's so deathly dull that it's not even unintentionally funny, 1 June 2006

If you're looking for entertainment, look elsewhere. Here's what you'll find in C.B. Hustlers – a dozen or so vans, C.B. radios, and three decent looking women playing hookers. What you won't find is a plot, acting ability, production values, comedy, or much of anything interesting. In short, C.B. Hustlers is about as bad a movie as you can find. And it's so deathly dull that it's not even unintentionally funny. If you're idea of a good movie consists of long shots of a half dozen vans parked in a field with a bunch of unknown people walking around drinking beer, then you're in luck. About 15 minutes of C.B. Hustlers short runtime is made up of just such a shot. Entertaining? I don't think so.

1/10

Sabotage (1936)

An interesting, early effort from Hitchcock, 1 June 2006

Although it's probably evident if you've read some of the other things I've written, I'm not a writer. I sometimes have difficulty putting my thoughts on a given movie into words. For whatever reason, I'm having more problems writing about Sabotage than I usually do with a movie. There are a lot of things I enjoyed about the movie. The plot, the acting (especially Sylvia Sidney), and Hitchcock's ability to create tension worked for me. Like a lot of others, the "bomb on the bus" scene is the highlight of the movie. Hitchcock's genius at creating tension is as evident in this scene as any I've run across.

Even though I've rated the film a 7/10, there are problems I have with Sabotage that bothered me. I usually hate the term "dated" when discussing movies, but it's the best term I can come up with to describe my feeling toward Sabotage. It might be that I haven't seen enough British films from the 30s or maybe it was the poor transfer on the DVD I watched, but I couldn't shake the feeling. It's really a minor point and it won't deter me from my mission of watching and discovering more of Hitchcock's older, pre-Hollywood films.

7/10

Boot Hill (1969)

- La collina degli stivali
Okay, but nothing special, 1 June 2006

I've wanted to see Boot Hill for a while now, but it's been difficult to find a watchable transfer. I realize now that I haven't been missing much. For the most part, the film is standard Spaghetti Western stuff. A group of claim jumpers, lead by Honey Fisher (Victor Buono), have everyone in a small mining town under their control. Eventually, though, one of the townsfolk gets tired of being robbed and asks for the help of his friend, Cat Stevens (Terence Hill). Using a traveling circus as cover, Stevens is able to get into town unnoticed for a final showdown with Fisher and his gang of thugs.

Other than the use of the circus, the plot and action in Boot Hill aren't as original or as good as you'll find in some other films of this type. The final showdown is predictable and lacks any real tension. When Stevens finally meets up with Finch, the head bad guy, nothing much happens. Although most of the film is played straight, there are a few attempts at humor that feel out of place. For the most part, the acting is decent, but it's nothing to write home about. Hill, Bud Spencer, and Woody Strode are okay, but it's nothing special. The exception is Buono who is by far the standout in the film. Unfortunately, his screen time is limited and he doesn't even appear until the movie is half over.

Where Boot Hill excels and what makes it unique are the directorial and editing decisions made with the film. There are a number of instances where scenes of violence are quickly spliced with scenes of the circus. Gunfight – a clown playing a trumpet – a man gets shot – a trapeze act – hiding in a barn – dancing girls. It's a nice touch.

Finally, whether intentional or not, Boot Hill features several scenes that can best be described as homosexual in nature. From the miners dancing check-to-check in the opening to Bud Spencer calling the tall, blond, good looking cowboy he lives with "Baby Doll" to the unexplained relationship between Woody Strode and the young, good looking trapeze artist, there's an undeniable homoerotic feel underlying a lot of the movie.

5/10

Black Samurai (1977)

You can't question Kelly's athletic ability, but his acting ability – forget about it., 29 May 2006

When a Hong Kong diplomat's daughter is kidnapped by drug smuggler / Satanist named Janicot, Robert Sand aka the Black Samurai (Jim Kelly) is called in to rescue the girl. And it's more than a job, it's personal. Sand and the girl have a relationship. Sand must use all his skill karate skill and training to bust up the bad guys and free the girl.

In something I wrote recently about the movie 100 Rifles, I called Jim Brown "wooden". That was before I saw Black Samurai. Jim Kelly makes Jim Brown look positively animated. Kelly may have been a martial arts master and good in the choreographed fights scenes, but a thespian he ain't. You can't question Kelly's athletic ability, but his acting ability – forget about it. Believe it or not, Kelly isn't the worst this movie has to offer. Most of the rest of the cast is even worse.

Everything about Black Samurai is, in a word, amateurish. The movie is a technical mess. Editing, cinematography, lighting, sound, etc. are horrible. Al Adamson has to be one of the most untalented directors ever. It's amazing he was able to find people willing to hire him to make so many movies. Ed Wood comes off looking like Alfred Hitchcock in comparison.

Even with all the faults, and there are plenty, there is some entertainment value to be had in Black Samurai. Where else are you going to see Jim Kelly kicking butt, battling midgets, fighting a vulture, flying in a jet pack, and just being plain old cool?

3/10

Gladiators 7 (1962)

- I sette gladiatori
If you've seen either Seven Samurai or The Magnificent Seven, the plot of Gladiators 7 should seem familiar., 29 May 2006

If you've seen either Seven Samurai or The Magnificent Seven, the plot of Gladiators 7 should seem familiar. Gladiators 7 is the Italian/Peplum take on this winning formula. To help him avenge his father's death, Darius (Richard Harrison) rounds up six of his gladiator buddies. They train together, laugh together, and fight together with defeating a much larger and better armed force as their ultimate goal. As I said, it's not very original, but that's just part of the problem. The biggest issue I have with Gladiators 7 is with its lead, Richard Harrison. He's so unappealing that I could have cared less about what happened to him. He's dull and incredibly hard to root for. A few original twists to the plot and a different actor playing the film's main character might have made Gladiators 7 a good movie.

4/10

100 Rifles (1969)

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em., 29 May 2006

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. That would seem to be part of the thinking behind 100 Rifles. By the late 60s, the traditional American Western had been replaced by the Euro or Spaghetti Western with more emphasis on violence and blurred lines between bad and good. 100 Rifles was filmed in Spain and has that same raw, dirty look to it that most of the Westerns coming out of Europe had at the time. The biggest difference is that 100 Rifles is an American production. The film features an interesting storyline and several good action sequences with a couple of train shootouts being the highlight of the film for me. A lot of the action may seem over-the-top, but that's the way I like my Spaghetti Westerns.

100 Rifles actually has four main characters played by Jim Brown, Burt Reynolds, Raquel Welch, and Fernando Lamas. Brown is by far the weakest of the four. To describe his acting as wooden would be an insult to trees everywhere. He's simply out of his league with the rest of the cast. Reynolds is surprisingly good as the half-breed Yaqui Joe Herrera. At first, he may seem to be little more than a mischievous drunken outlaw, but there's a definite intelligence behind the hyena like laugh. Besides being one of the most beautiful women who ever walked the planet, Welch throws herself into her role and is reasonably convincing. But Lamas is the real standout. His General Verdugo is a marvelous character more obsessed with personal revenge than in doing what is necessary to beat his enemies. Other than Brown, it's a solid cast.

While the story is good, if not predictable for this kind of movie, it runs on a little too long. Cutting about 20 minutes out of the film's 110 minute runtime and making it tighter would have gone a long way to making 100 Rifles a much better movie. One of the biggest draws of this film upon its initial release was the scandalous love scene between Welch and Brown. It has so little bearing on the plot that cutting it out would have been a good place to start with the editing scissors.

6/10

Some Girls Do (1969)

It's too bad they only made two of these films., 28 May 2006

Even though the comparisons with James Bond are inevitable, I don't think they are fair. I enjoy the Bond movies and however similar, the two Hugh Drummond films from the 60s have their own, unique style. They're played a little more for humor and lack some of the big budget special effects. But fans of the better known Bond films should find something to enjoy in either of the lesser known films Deadlier Than the Male or Some Girls Do.

I can just about sum up what I like about Some Girls Do by using what I wrote for Deadlier Than the Male as a guide. However, if push comes to shove, I actually prefer Some Girls Do to the first film in the series. The 60s feel, Richard Johnson's Drummond, the villainous James Villers, scenes stealers like Ronnie Stevens and Robert Morley, terrific locations, and the implausible yet wonderful gadgets and traps, including a small army of female automatons, are all a delight. As with the first movie, my absolute favorite moments are those with the two female killers. Daliah Lavi and Beba Loncar make the movie worth checking out just to see them. Lavi, in particular, is one of those women that seem to have only existed in the 60s that I enjoy watching so much.

It's too bad they only made two of these films. I would have liked to see this series continued.

8/10

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

What a mistake!, 28 May 2006

Sadly, the third movie in the X-Men series doesn't come close to living up to either its potential or the precedent established by the first two movies. But before I get to that, I'll cover a couple aspects of the film that really worked for me. First, the action sequences are generally well done. As individual set pieces, the action scenes work. Second, when I first heard that Kelsey Grammar was brought on board to play the Beast in X-Men: The Last Stand, I was a little apprehensive. I mean the thought of Frasier Crane doesn't exactly conjure images of an action hero. After seeing the film, I cannot imagine anyone else in the role. Grammar is the center of attention in every scene in which he appears – and it's not just the makeup.

On to the problems:

I can sum up most of the issues I have with X-Men: The Last Stand in two words – Brett Ratner. The decision to allow Ratner to direct X-Men: The Last Stand was a total mistake. Ratner seems to think that throwing together action sequences and CGI effects is all you need to make a good movie. Sorry Mr. Ratner, but the first two films were much more than this. The script and direction feel rushed and sloppy with little thought given to what made the series so good to begin with. There is no character development. Mutants are thrown on screen with the sole purpose of showing off special effects – not in an attempt to create memorable characters. And the characters from the previous two movies are handled poorly. Jean Grey's conversion to the Phoenix isn't explained at all. And she does nothing for most of the movie other than standing around looking like a reject from an army of the undead. Cyclops, a major character from the other movies, is killed off with no fanfare. And his death occurs off-screen! Why? Rogue is totally unnecessary. None of her scenes have anything to do with the plot other than adding some unneeded WB style melodrama. Professor Xavier and Mystique – gone far too quickly. And Wolverine has been reduced to little more than an Arnold Schwarzenegger wannabe spouting one-liners like he's working at the local comedy club.

I could go on and on, but you get the idea. In short, it's a disaster.

4/10

Mysterious Island of Beautiful Women (1979) (TV)

Predictable deserted island story with a number of television movie-of-the-week types and Hollywood has-beens, 27 May 2006

Mysterious Island of Beautiful Women is an utterly predictable deserted island story with a number of television movie-of-the-week types and Hollywood has-beens. The plot: A group of young Catholic school girls are evacuated during the Indo-China War. Their plane crashes on an island and the girls are left to fend for themselves. Fifteen or so years later, a plane carrying a group of men is forced to land on the island. At first the girls, now women, are leery of the men. But the women soon realize that the men and their guns may be able to help them defeat the headhunters who regularly visit the island.

Everything about this television movie is telegraphed from a mile away. The women's reaction to the men – predictable. The men's reaction to the wild women – predictable. The fact that the women's leader, Lizabeth, is a nut-case – predictable. The fact that the women's spiritual leader, Sister Teresa, is actually dead – predictable. The narrow escape at the end from the headhunters – predictable. There's not one surprising moment in the entire 90+ minute runtime. I was able to make coffee, do a load of laundry, and play with my son as I watched the movie and I didn't miss a thing.

The ending of the film is a real letdown. Mysterious Island of Beautiful Women builds toward a promised showdown between the stranded men and the "beautiful women" with the headhunters, but it never materializes. Instead, everyone hops on the plane and takes off. What a cop-out!

3/10

Cannibal Ferox (1981)

"Oh God, please let her die soon. Oh, let her die soon. And let me die soon too, please.", 27 May 2006

Maybe I've seen too many of these cannibal films in a short amount of time, but in many respects, Cannibal Ferox seems like the same old thing I've already seen. I mean there are only so many alligators that you can watch being gutted before it gets a little repetitive. It's not that Cannibal Ferox is the worst example of this particular Italian sub-genre, it's just not overly original – the same basic plot, similar music, and plenty of over-the-top bloodletting. I have nothing to back this up but I get the feeling that director Umberto Lenzi was trying to outdo Ruggero Deodato's Cannibal Holocaust. And in some respects, he succeeds. There are plenty of moments of outrageous violence, highlighted by the scene where one of the characters is hung by her breasts. Ugh! This is only one of a couple of dozen scenes that had me feeling very uncomfortable. As a gory cannibal film, Cannibal Ferox is a winner, but violence is the only area where Lenzi's film approaches Deodato's film. I'm not sure how to express this or if it's even appropriate when discussing cannibal movies, but Cannibal Ferox lacks the artistry and beauty I find in Cannibal Holocaust. There is a sense of "style" missing from Cannibal Ferox.

6/10

The Anniversary (1968)

"My dear, would you mind sitting somewhere else? Body odor offends me.", 26 May 2006

Quite simply, Bette Davis dominates every scene and every aspect of The Anniversary. If you don't like Bette Davis, you'd be wise to skip this one altogether. Davis plays Mrs. Taggart, the overbearing mother to three sons. She controls every aspect of their lives. They cannot make a move without her approval. And if she doesn't approve, she's not above ruining one of her sons if it suits her selfish purposes. The Anniversary covers the events surrounding the annual celebration of Mrs. Taggart's wedding anniversary to the late Mr. Taggart. It's Mrs. Taggart's day and she lets everyone know it. She uses this event to cement her control over her sons by threatening financial ruin, jail, and/or public humiliation and by degrading them and their significant others.

Bette Davis is in fine form in The Anniversary. She's evil, vindictive, manipulative, and a ton of fun. She chews scenery like nobody's business. The rest of the cast is good, but they are no match for Ms. Davis. Some of the comments she makes to her youngest son's new fiancé are unbelievable. One of the best is when she quite casually tells the girl, "My dear, would you mind sitting somewhere else? Body odor offends me." Another priceless example is Mrs. Taggart's reaction to the frightened fiancé when she discovers Mrs. Taggart's glass eye in her bed. I don't know of many actresses who could pull-off being so rude and just plain evil and still have the viewer rooting for them.

Hammer Studios made this incredibly black comedy during the 60s when a lot of aging female stars were taking roles in horror movies. The Anniversary may not be a horror film, but it's certainly not the norm you would expect for someone like Bette Davis. I don't know how The Anniversary did financially upon release, but it's the kind of movie I would have liked to have seen Hammer making more of in the late 60, early 70s. Who knows? It might have saved the company.

8/10

The Pearl of Death (1944)

"I don't like the smell of you - an underground smell, the sick sweetness of decay.", 26 May 2006

The Pearl of Death is about average for the Basil Rathbone Sherlock Holmes films I've seen so far. It's not as good as something like The Scarlet Claw, but I thought it was better than some of the others I've seen. Rathbone and Nigel Bruce give their usual solid performances. However, I found that a little bit too much of the focus was on Bruce. That's not always a bad thing, but here he really didn't have much to do. Watching him paste clippings in a book for several minutes isn't the most entertaining thing in the world. My only complaint with the supporting cast is I would have liked more Evelyn Ankers. Other than that, they're fine. The story is good and it's nice to see Holmes fail on occasion as he does in the beginning of The Pearl of Death. In fact it's an incredible change of pace to see Holmes make such a gargantuan mistake that ends up costing several people their lives.

7/10

The Wild World of Batwoman (1966)

What an unmitigated mess!, 26 May 2006

What an unmitigated mess! I know others have said something similar, but I had the same thought while watching The Wild World of Batwoman – it's like someone took portions from a half-dozen bad movies and randomly edited them together. It takes real talent to make something this bad. There is no comprehensible plot to speak of. The special effects are nonexistent. The Wild World of Batwoman takes acting to a new low. The comedy sequences are totally lame. In short, there's not one redeeming quality to be found in this movie. It's one of the first movies I've seen that the MST3K crew had trouble with.

If it's as bad as I say, why haven't I rated it any lower? There are a couple of moments that save this one from the dreaded "1" rating. First, there are a few scenes that despite themselves are unintentionally hilarious. As I said, the scenes that were meant to be funny fail miserably. But some of the scenes meant to be serious are laugh-out-loud funny. Second, any movie with this much dancing by scantily clad women deserves at least a point or two.

2/10

Let Sleeping Corpses Lie (1974)

- Non si deve profanare il sonno dei morti
"You're all the same the lot of you, with your long hair and faggot clothes.", 24 May 2006

And to think, I've avoided this movie for years. I love horror movies, but I'm not the biggest zombie fan in the world. But Let Sleeping Corpses Lie is different. It's intelligent, dark, witty, and creepy – and that's a hard combination to achieve. I've read a number of reviews that complain about the acting and I don't get it. I thought that Cristina Galbo, Ray Lovelock, and Arthur Kennedy were excellent in their roles. No one was going to win an award for this movie, but they're certainly not as bad as others have indicated. I also appreciate the fact that the film features what I'll call scenes of "controlled gore". There certainly are a few disturbing images, but Director Jorge Grau never lets the gore go over-the-top into quasi-parody and that's a good thing. My only complaint would be with the final scene. It's just so unnecessary. Let the movie end on a dark note. There's nothing wrong with that.

8/10

Frankenstein (1931)

"Crazy, am I? We'll see whether I'm crazy or not.", 24 May 2006

Revisiting Frankenstein is always a wonderful experience. I watch it today with the same enthusiasm and awe I did nearly 35 years ago. Everything about the film is so perfect. Acting, direction, cinematography, set design, plot, dialogue, special effects, etc. are top notch. And although each of these areas deserves to be discussed in detail (and have in the volumes that have been written on Frankenstein), I'll focus on two areas that really standout to me – Boris Karloff as the monster and James Whales direction.

Is there a more iconic image in horror than Boris Karloff as the Frankenstein monster? I sincerely doubt it. Even those who wouldn't be caught dead watching a horror film are familiar with that image. Beyond Jack Pierce's make-up, Karloff is amazing in the role. Even with the make-up, Karloff gives the monster life. We are able to see and feel the emotions the monster goes through. There is no better example than the scene with the monster and the little girl. As the monster stumbles out of the woods, there is a cautious look about him as his experiences with humans have thus far been less than satisfactory. But when the little girl accepts him and wants to play with him, the look of caution is transformed into a look of utter happiness. He smiles, he laughs, and he plays. But that emotion is replaced by one of confusion mixed with anger when he accidentally kills the girl. It's all there on Karloff wonderful face. It's this life that Karloff imbibes in the monster that makes Frankenstein a real classic.

I've always thought that James Whale's direction was ahead of its time. In an era when directors were using what I call the "plant and shoot" method of filming, Whale made his camera a fluid part of the action. Whale takes the viewer beyond just watching moving images. He uses the camera to take the viewer into the scene. A small example is the way Whale filmed characters moving from one room to the next. The camera moves with the characters. Another example is the tracking shot Whale uses as the father carries his dead child into the town. As I said earlier, it has a fluidity in the way Whale filmed these scenes that makes it seem more natural. Finally, the way Whale introduces the monster is a highlight of the film. The monster backs into the room. As he turns, Whale shows the monster with three quick, ever tighter shots, ending with a close-up of the monster's face. Every Hollywood star of that era could have only wished for an introduction like that.

While I have done nothing but praise Frankenstein, I'm not such a fan that I can't spot flaws in the film. The major issue with me has always been the way the scenes of action, horror, and violence are inter-cut with scenes of tranquility and bliss. I realize that was the way things were done in the 30s so people wouldn't, in essence, overload on horror, but it can make the film seem a little disjointed. But it's difficult to hold Whale overly responsible for this custom of the period.

9/10

Samson vs. the Vampire Women (1962)

- Santo vs. las mujeres vampiro
A big, heaping serving of cheese, 22 May 2006

I've only seen a handful of the Santo films, but Samson vs. the Vampire Women is so far my favorite. It's a cheese-filled extravaganza. The state of Wisconsin is jealous of the amount of cheese on display in this movie. What do you expect when you mix Santo, the masked Mexican wrestler, with a bevy of beautiful vampires? I don't know about you, but I expect pure, delicious cheese.

Going through a plot summary or analyzing the positives and negatives seems a bit silly with a movie like Samson vs. the Vampire Women. Instead, I'll try to hit on some of the more fun, but bizarre, moments from the movie:

1. Even though he's called Samson by everyone in the movie and the title lists him as Samson, someone forgot to tell the crowd at the wrestling arena who seem overly exuberant in chanting "Santo!"

2. Apparently, Santo has a closed circuit television camera mounted to the front of his impossibly small sports car.

3. You simply must watch the dubbed version. The dubbing is so bad that it adds a whole other dimension to the movie.

4. Mexican vampire women are the hottest.

5. Santo has an uncanny knack of showing up just after the person he's protecting has been kidnapped. Why not just stay put and be there when the bad guys make their move?

6. Why does Professor Orlof ask the police for their help throughout the movie? They seem to be incapable of even the most routine of police activities.

7. Don't feel bad about fast forwarding through the incredibly long and dull wrestling matches. It makes watching Santo that much more enjoyable.

8. It's odd that Santo can do battle with three vampire goons and come out on top, yet when going one-on-one in a wrestling ring, he gets the snot beat out of him.

There are more, but you get the idea. Watching Santo is best done with an open mind and the notion that nothing is to be taken seriously. If you do this, you're bound to have a good time with Samson vs. the Vampire Women.

6/10

Friday the 13th (1980)

"Doomed... You're all doomed.", 21 May 2006

Friday the 13th may not have been the first movie of its kind and the kill scenes may have been copied from other movies, but there's no denying the importance of the film. Friday the 13th is the film I see as most responsible for the slasher boom of the 80s. It and its sequels proved that horror fans were willing to pay money to see practically the same movie (with slight modifications) over and over. As I look back at it now, it seems a bit silly to me, but I was one of those who willing plopped down my money every few years for a chance to see another Friday the 13th movie.

I don't see any point in going through the plot. Most horror fans know it by heart. Instead, I'll cover a few of the things I like about the movie. First, the kill scenes. Tom Savini's special effects are great. I especially like the scene where Kevin Bacon is speared from under the bed. Second, regardless of the number of times I've seen it, the film does have an atmosphere of fear about it. The repetitive music, the unseen killer, and the bodies dropping at every turn have always given me chills. Third, I enjoy the final showdown between the killer and the "final girl". I've always thought the final fight scene was a highlight of the film. Finally, and this is a personal thing, but Friday the 13th was the first movie of its type I ever saw. I hadn't seen movies like Halloween or Black Christmas when I first saw this one. Therefore, it holds a special place with me.

Unfortunately, even though I'm a fan, I see problems. The biggest is the predictability of the plot. Even though Friday the 13th was made early in the slasher cycle, how hard was it to predict the outcome? Also, the characters in the movie are incredibly stupid. A lot of the murders could have been prevented if anyone at any point in the movie had demonstrated any brain power. But then it wouldn't have been so much fun.

It may not be the kind of movie the more "sophisticated" horror fan admits to enjoying, but I'm not above admitting that Friday the 13th remains a favorite of mine. It's fun stuff!

7/10

The Killer Reserved Nine Seats (1974)

- L'assassino ha riservato nove poltrone
These have to be some of the dumbest people ever assembled, 21 May 2006

The Killer Reserved Nine Seats is the Italian/Giallo take on Agatha Christie's Ten Little Indians. A group of people are gathered together and one by one murdered. In this case, nine people find themselves locked inside an large, old theater with a masked killer on the loose. Each person comes under suspicion as each seems to have had some sort of motive for the killings. While some of the bloody mayhem occurs off-screen, the murder scenes are the highlight of the movie.

Unfortunately, the rest of The Killer Reserved Nine Seats isn't nearly as good as the murder scenes. There's far too much talk. These people spend an inordinate amount of time discussing things which have no bearing on the film. And these have to be some of the dumbest people ever assembled. One at a time, they seem determined to investigate the dark passageways and poorly lit rooms of the theater, making themselves easy prey for the killer. Searching the theater might seem like a good idea, but how about taking someone with you? After a while, it just becomes tedious waiting for the next victim to go off alone. The plot also includes some supernatural elements that are out of place for this kind of movie. It just doesn't fit. Finally, the ending is a mess. Maybe it was just the cut of the film I saw, but nothing was made clear in the end. A woman thought to be dead wakes up, realizes she's okay, and walks out of the theater. Uh, whatever!

I'm a Giallo junkie. I've seen the best and the worst that the genre has to offer. I had been looking forward to seeing The Killer Reserves Nine Seats, so it pains me to place this one near the bottom of the heap.

4/10

Over the Hedge (2006)

After a few missteps, DreamWorks comes up with a winner, 21 May 2006

Having seen the abysmal products DreamWorks has put out recently (Madagascar was bad and Shark Tale was unwatchable), I wasn't expecting much from Over the Hedge. I couldn't have been more wrong. Over the Hedge is an enjoyable story of a band of animals faced with the prospect of finding food as suburbia encroaches on their home. While there are a few slow spots, most of it is very well done. There are some segments that are genuinely laugh-out-loud funny, none more so than a 2 minute scene near the end featuring the spastic, hyper Hammy. The script is well written, taking pokes at rampant consumerism and the need to preserve the environment without ever feeling preachy. The animation in Over the Hedge is top notch and the voice work is exceptional with Wanda Sykes being the standout to me. In short, my wife and I had a great time with it and our three year old stayed entertained throughout. What more can you ask?

7/10

Jane and the Lost City (1987)

My one word review - Uneven, 21 May 2006

Jane and the Lost City is the story of a band of plucky but incompetent band of Allies in a race to fortune in diamonds with an equally incompetent band of Nazis. Along the way, both groups run into a series of mildly amusing adventures and situations, including title character Jane's ability to lose her clothing at the most inopportune moments. As I've never seen the comic strip Jane and the Lost City is based on, I probably don't have the proper context in which to place this movie. That's no necessarily a bad thing as I also have no preconceived biases. The entire thing is played for laughs. Unfortunately, the comedy sequences in Jane and the Lost City are too uneven for me to rate the film any higher. While some of the comedy worked (the tango scene is hysterical), some of it fell flat (most everything Nazi henchman Hans did wasn't funny in the slightest). The acting is also uneven and ranges from really good (Graham Stark as the butler Tombs) to dreadful (Kristen Hughes as Jane). Overall, I like the idea behind Jane and the Lost City, but more consistency in the writing and acting would have made this one much better.

5/10

Amuck (1972)

- Alla ricerca del piacere
Even with Barbara Bouchet and Rosalba Neri, it's surprisingly average, 20 May 2006

Given that Amuck features two of my Euro-favorites, Barbara Bouchet and Rosalba Neri, it's a surprisingly average giallo. Bouchet is a young secretary working for a publishing house. She becomes concerned when her friend and fellow co-worker goes missing. She gets assigned to the same writer (played by the dull Farley Granger) to investigate her friend's disappearance. She immediately suspects the writer and his lover, Neri, and must endure their sexual advances if she is to find her friend.

For a film of this type to be effective, I've found that it's important to believe the protagonist is in real danger. You have to believe that their investigations might lead to their death. Other than the duck hunting scene in Amuck, I never once felt that Bouchet's character was in any real sort of mortal peril. While there was a real chance she was going to be drugged and forced to have sex, I knew she wasn't going to die. Add to this the fact that the solution to the murder is laid out in the first 30 minutes and you've got no real tension or suspense.

5/10

Frankenstein Created Woman (1967)

The Bride of Hammer's Frankenstein, 19 May 2006

This entry in Hammer's Frankenstein series finds Baron Frankenstein (Peter Cushing) continuing his experiments with the help of Dr. Hertz and his servant, Hans. The Baron is working on capturing a soul and placing it in another body. When Hans is accused of killing his girlfriend's father and put to death, the Baron has the chance to put part of his theories to the test by capturing Hans' soul. As chance would have it, Hans' girlfriend, Christina, commits suicide providing Baron Frankenstein a body for Hans' soul. While it seems the Baron has finally succeeded, his new creation, a combination of the wrongly accused Hans and grief-stricken Christina, is actually plotting and carrying out a series of revenge killings against those responsible for her father's death.

The differences between Frankenstein Created Woman and the other entries in the series should be quite obvious to anyone familiar with Hammer. The most obvious is the Baron's creation. Unlike the other films where Baron Frankenstein succeeds in creating a monster, here he has created a being capable of moving undetected throughout society. She's a beautiful woman adept at using her charms to help her ensnare her would be victims. She's bright, cunning, and deadly. It's quite the lethal combination.

Peter Cushing was never better. Cushing is such a pleasure to watch in most anything he did. He's a whirlwind of energy and never dull. In Frankenstein Created Woman, he's given more of an opportunity to show the human side of the Baron. He's allowed to actually be funny and show a sympathetic nature toward his creation. Yet he's completely focused and believable in the pursuit of his goals. Some of my favorite moments in the film involve the Baron's quips directed toward the rather addle minded Dr. Hertz. Thorley Walters couldn't be better as Dr. Hertz. He makes a perfect target for Frankenstein's barbs. The pair are a lot of fun to watch. Susan Denberg is more than adequate as the Baron's creation. It's a shame that she appears to have "burned out" so early in her career. She may not have been the greatest actress of all time, but I would have enjoyed the opportunity to see her in other films.

7/10

She-Wolf of London (1946)

An average, but unoriginal, little mystery, 19 May 2006

Phyllis Allenby (June Lockhart) is about to be wed. But a series of murders in a park nearby the Allenby estate attributed to a werewolf have her rethinking her plans. Phyllis is sick over the thought that she may be responsible for the grisly deaths. Muddy shoes, wet clothes, and blood on her hands found in Phyllis' bedroom led her to believe that she may be the werewolf. Is Phyllis a werewolf, prowling the night looking for her next victim?

Other than the title, I'm not sure why Universal decided to include this one on their Wolf Man Legacy Set. She-Wolf of London has nothing in common with The Wolf Man. It's not a horror film. There is no werewolf (or she-wolf for that matter). Instead, She-Wolf of London is an average, but unoriginal, little mystery. For the film to work, you have to believe that Phyllis Allenby is a murderer. Unfortunately, I never once bought into the notion that Phyllis was the killer, let alone a snarling werewolf.

My real problem with She-Wolf of London is in the casting. While there are some nice performances from Sara Haden as the overprotective Aunt and Lloyd Corrigan as the bumbling Detective Latham, June Lockhart is horrible as the film's heroine. She is terribly miscast. Maybe it's just that I've seen her in too many roles as the caring, All-American mother, but she's not a believable killer.

4/10

The Sadist (1963)

Shockingly Good, 18 May 2006

I had heard good things about The Sadist, but to be honest, I was skeptical. I haven't seen everything listed on Arch Hall, Jr.'s filmography, but I've been less than impressed with what I have seen. Like a lot of other people, I am shocked by just how good The Sadist truly is. It's a wonderfully sick and twisted tale with tons of suspense and tension. There's an undeniable atmosphere of menace in almost every scene. I might not think much of Arch Hall, Jr., but he's perfect in the role of the crazed Charlie Tibbs. Think of him and his girlfriend as a 60's version of Mickey and Mallory from Natural Born Killers. It's the same kind of ruthless, almost gleeful, lack of respect for human life. It's good stuff and definitely one of the better public domain type films I've run across.

Finally, I'm amazed that this is the only film credit listed for Helen Hovey (Arch's cousin). I thought she played the vulnerable, frightened character quite well. I would have liked to see her in some other movies.

8/10

The Invisible Man (1933)

"I think we'll start with a reign of terror.", 17 May 2006

People tend to use the word "classic" too freely. I can't help but laugh when I hear some of the movies that people call "classics". The term gets thrown around so much that it often looses some of its importance and real meaning. I try to reserve "classic" to a select group of films that I believe have achieved a certain status and have withstood the test of time. And I have no problem putting the label "classic" on The Invisible Man.

James Whale made a lot of great films in the 1930s. Some (Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein, for example) may be better known, but I've always thought of The Invisible Man as the best of the bunch. It's got everything. Terrific performances, incredible special effects, nice comedic touches, and technical brilliance are found in abundance throughout the film.

- Terrific Performances: For someone who only has a few seconds of actual screen time, Claude Rains is amazing. His voice creates such a presence that at times it's easy to forget that he's not actually there. As for Una O'Connor, I've seen some people complain about Whale's use of her, but I think she was never better than in The Invisible Man. She's great whether playing the proper landlord showing a new guest to his room or as the overly hysterical woman afraid for her life. The rest of the cast, especially E.E. Clive and Gloria Stuart, is exceptional.

- Incredible Special Effects: It's amazing to revisit The Invisible Man and see how well the special effects have withstood the passage of time. They were state-of-the-art in 1933 and they remain impressive today. It took some real craftsmanship to pull-off the invisibility gags seen in The Invisible Man. To me, none is more impressive than the first time we get a glimpse under the bandages while he's eating and we see no lower jaw. Impressive stuff!

- Nice Comedic Touches: Billed as a horror film, The Invisible Man actually contains more scenes of humor than horror. I've already mentioned O'Connor, but she's only a small part of the humor in the film. The police, the various frightened passersby, and even Claude Rains himself add to the fun found in The Invisible Man. I'm of the opinion that it never goes overboard, but fits nicely into the plot.

- Technical Brilliance: Beyond the special effects, the film is wonderful from a technical standpoint. Lighting, cinematography, and set design are incredible and some of the best of the 30s. Everything looks perfect. In my opinion, Whale never did better. I've always been impressed by the way Whale used his camera as part of the action when many of his contemporaries seemed content with the "plant it and shoot" style of film-making.

The only negative aspect of the film that I can possibly complain about is William Harrigan in the role of Rains' rival, Dr. Arthur Kemp. He's just not as good as those around him. Other than that little quibble, I've got nothing to complain about. I believe it should be easy to see why I, for one, consider The Invisible Man a classic!

9/10

The Beauties and the Beast (1974)

It's like a guy wearing a black bathroom rug and false teeth, 16 May 2006

I'm not sure if Beauties and the Beast is a movie or just a compilation of someone's home movies. The plot, if you can call it that, involves a Bigfoot type creature terrorizing a bunch of hippies and nudists in the woods. The creature looks more like a guy wearing a black bathroom rug and false teeth than an actual Bigfoot. He kidnaps girl after girl taking them to his blanket furnished cave. He gropes them a couple of times and that's about it. I have no idea what happened to this girls or if they ever escaped. This film doesn't bother with things like that. In reality, Beauties and the Beast is a cheap, poorly made, and horribly acted excuse of a softcore porn film. Everything is simply awful. I can't think of any reason, and that includes the generous supply of nudity, to recommend this one to anyone. It's just so gawd awful! And if you must watch this thing, beware of the soundtrack. It's a two pronged assault against the senses. First, there's the generic, overly-sappy elevator music. It almost put me to sleep on a couple of occasions (that, and the dull movie). Second, one of the hippies insists on singing a folk song. I think my ears may still be bleeding.

2/10

Creepshow (1982)

"Just call me Billie, everyone does.", 16 May 2006

Stephen King and George Romero combined their talents to create the 1982 horror/comedy anthology Creepshow. They do an excellent job of giving the whole movie 50s/60s pulp magazine feel to it. Short stories, vibrant colors, and a nice wrap around sequence contribute to this feeling. Like those pulp magazines, Creepshow is divided into segments or short stories – five to be exact. While some are more entertaining than others, none are unwatchable.

1. "Father's Day" – A murdered man returns from the grave to "get his cake". The special effects are the highlight of this segment. It may not be as scary as I would like, but it's reasonably entertaining. Rating – 6/10.

2. "The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill" – A man gets a little to close to a meteorite and finds himself being transformed into a plant. This segment is played for laughs, but unfortunately, none of them work. Stephen King stars as Jordy Verrill. This vignette might have been better with a real actor instead of King. Rating – 4/10.

3. "Something to Tide You Over" – A man uses the tides to do away with his cheating wife and her lover. If this segment weren't so predictable, it would be among the best. Tom Savini's makeup is the real star of this segment. Rating – 6/10.

4. "The Crate" – A henpecked professor uses the contents of an old, forgotten about crate to help him with his problems. This is easily the highlight of the movie and would have made a nice feature length movie by itself. Adrienne Barbeau and Hal Holbrook star and are both great. The creature effects and design are a winner. Rating – 8/10.

5. "They're Creeping Up On You" – A man with a cockroach phobia finds his home inundated by cockroaches. E.G. Marshall is good enough in the portion of the movie, but I find it dull. This vignette does have a great set design, though. Rating – 4/10

If you average the ratings I've given the individual segments, you'll come up with my overall rating of a 6/10. As you can see, I find Creepshow very hit-or-miss. If the entire film were as good as "The Crate", it would easily be on the list of my favorite horror movies.

6/10

Curse of the Devil (1973)

- El retorno de Walpurgis
It's certainly not the worst Naschy film I've seen, 15 May 2006

I'm like the Energizer Bunny when it comes to Paul Naschy – I keep going and going and going with the hope of one day finding a Naschy film I really enjoy. I know the man has his fans, but I've yet to see the appeal. My latest excursion into Naschy's filmography is Curse of the Devil. It's certainly not the worst Naschy film I've seen (that would be Dr. Jekyll vs. the Werewolf), but the best I can do is call it an average horror film.

The film gets off to a good start. The story explaining how Daninsky (Naschy) became a werewolf is well done. Much like Hammer's Curse of the Werewolf, the backstory presented in Curse of the Devil is nice as it provides a reasonable (well, as reasonable as horror movies can be) explanation behind lycanthropy. Too often, horror movies expect us to accept a person is a werewolf without any explanation other than they were bitten by a werewolf. It's as if it's always been that way, so just accept it. I really appreciated and enjoyed this portion of the film. These early scenes also have a nice Gothic feel to them and an attention to detail that really adds to the atmosphere.

But then Daninsky changes into a werewolf and the whole thing goes downhill. It's the same old story we've seen numerous times. And, if you've seen many Naschy films, you'll definitely feel like you've seen it before. If Naschy is anything, he's consistent and predictable. From what I've seen, his films rarely stray from the tired and true path. But more specifically, there are a couple of things about the werewolf scenes that bother me. First, how is he able to sneak up on everyone? Wouldn't the sound of a hulking, snarling werewolf be a tip-off that something's not quite right? Second, the "special effects" are abysmal even when taking into account the time period in which the movie was made and any budget limitations. Most of the werewolf victims in Curse of the Devil look like people who have, for whatever reason, poured marinara sauce on their faces. It's not very effective.

As I always seem to write when discussing a Naschy film, I'm not giving up. Even though I've yet to find that Naschy film that clicks with me, I'll keep going in hopes that sooner or later one will.

5/10

Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)

"Jason's body has disappeared from the morgue.", 14 May 2006

I know there are fans out there that feel the fourth installment in the Friday the 13th series is the best. I don't happen to agree. While the first three movies weren't necessarily groundbreaking in their innovation, there were moments in each that we had not seen before – at least in a Friday the 13th movie. By the time Paramount rolled out Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter in 1984, the 80s slasher-boom was in full swing. It was all but impossible to do anything new. Chapter 4 is one big cliché of the slasher genre and a rehash of everything that came before. This one follows the standard formula to a T - A group of idiotic kids go to the woods and for the first 2/3 of the film, we watch them behave like complete morons. Suddenly, and with very little build-up or suspense, Jason shows up and kills everyone in sight. In the end, the one person who seems most incapable of doing so "kills" Jason. The End. I think I wrote something just like this for the other Friday the 13th movies I've written about.

So far, all I've done is blast Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter. To be fair, it's actually not that bad as far as these films go. Most of the credit for this should go to Tom Savini. His special effects are top notch and worth the price of admission. One of my favorite kill scenes in the movie occurs early on with the hospital attendant in the morgue. That head snap is nicely done.

6/10

Street Law (1974)

- Il cittadino si ribella
The film's good, but Nero gives an uncharacteristically bad performance, 14 May 2006

What do you do when you've been beaten, robbed, and kidnapped and you don't feel the police are doing enough to find those responsible for the crime? If you're Carlo Antonelli (Franco Nero) you take matters into your own hands and go after the bad guys yourself. This is the basic premise of Enzo Castellari's Street Law. It's an action packed film with enough gun battles, car chases, and bloodshed to make the most ardent of fans happy. Some of the violence may seem a little far fetched, but that only adds to the fun. Castellari certainly has an eye for action sequences and films these scenes with some interesting camera work. The film does drag a bit during some of the more dialogue heavy scenes as Nero delivers another of his endless speeches railing against the police. The supporting cast is good with Giancarlo Prete giving a standout performance. The other name in the cast, Barbara Bach, is so underutilized that I forgot she was in the movie a couple of times.

As hard as this may be to believe, Franco Nero is actually the weak link in Street Law. Some of his reaction shots are ridiculous. Nero's character gets the stuffing beat out of him several times in the film. During these beatings, Nero has a look of complete astonishment on his face as if he didn't realize these baddies were going to beat him up if he kept interfering with them. This is just one example, but Nero needlessly overacts in several other scenes throughout the film. I don't know if it was Nero's fault or if Castellari is to blame, but it hurts the film.

7/10

An American Haunting (2005)

A big time disappointment, 14 May 2006

Growing up a couple hours away from Adams, TN, I've been aware of and fascinated by the Bell Witch as long as I can remember. I've heard all the stories and read all the books. So when I first heard about the movie An American Haunting, I knew I had to see it. To say I was disappointed would be a gross understatement.

I'll get the positives out of the way upfront. Donald Sutherland and Sissy Spacek are tremendously gifted actors. Their abilities shine regardless of the dreck they're given. Watching these two is about the only positive aspect of An American Haunting. It's a shame that these talented actors were presented with material that's so obviously beneath them.

On to the bad. I'll start with the cheap scare tactics employed by Director and Co- Screenwriter Courtney Solomon. If jump scare after jump scare makes for a good horror movie in your mind, An American Haunting is the movie for you. There's no attempt made to frighten the audience in any way other than with these cheap tactics. There's no atmosphere, there's no psychological horror, and there's nothing to get under your skin and disturb you after the movie ends. It's about as unsophisticated a brand of horror as you'll find.

Next, the movie begins by telling us that there is only one known case in history of a ghost killing a person. Unfortunately, however, the movie spends the next 91 minutes debunking this theory. I thought this was a movie about a haunting, not a dysfunctional family. The ending takes the whole legend of the Bell Witch and tosses it out the window. Why change the story? Have modern audiences become so jaded that they demand an explanation that fits their modern sensibilities? As I've already mentioned, the Bell Witch story is an interesting one and the mystery behind it seems to me to be far more entertaining than the explanation to Betsy's torment presented in An American Haunting. It's rubbish!

Finally, as far as creatively goes, An American Haunting is bland and pedestrian. The editing is sloppy, the direction is amateurish, and the cinematography is uninspired. I've seen made-for-television movies that were more exciting and better made from a creative standpoint. It's what I call "cut and paste" film-making.

3/10

At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul (1964)

- À Meia-Noite Levarei Sua Alma
Based on everything I knew about it, I thought this one was destined to be a winner, 13 May 2006

Over the years, I've gotten pretty good at spotting movies I know I'm going to enjoy. While many of these don't turn out to be in my Top 10 or anything, I generally find these movies enjoyable at a minimum. That's not the case with At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul. Given its cult following, subject matter, and recommendations from trusted individuals, I thought this one was destined to be a winner. I couldn't have been more wrong.

At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul is the first of the Brazilian Coffin Joe films. Jose Mojica Marins is Zé do Caixão, the mortician in a small town he holds sway over through physical and psychological threats. He's not above committing murder to get his way. The film has a lot of surreal imagery going for it that is interesting to look at. It's too bad that it's all for naught as the film is so deadly dull. All the interesting set decoration and eye candy in the world can't save it. Zé makes an interesting character, but he hardly looks like the big tough guy, bullying around everyone in town. He's more like a skinny little kid playing dress-up with a cape and top hat who throws tempter tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants. I still don't understand why a couple of the husky Brazilian townsfolk didn't get together and beat the snot out of Zé. Finally, there's the ending. After and hour and some odd minutes of At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul, I hoped my experience could be salvaged by a strong finale. Again, I was disappointed. That has to be one of the more unsatisfying endings I've seen recently.

Despite what I've written, I haven't given up on Coffin Joe just yet. I still plan to give This Night I Will Possess Your Corpse a chance. I only hope its better.

4/10

Dawn of the Dead (2004)

"OK, I have an idea. We draw straws and the loser runs across the lot with a ham sandwich.", 13 May 2006

I actually enjoyed Dawn of the Dead more than I thought I would. Not being the biggest fan in the world of the original, I found very little appealing about the thought of watching a remake. While my rating certainly doesn't indicate I thought it was a masterpiece, as a mindless action film, there's plenty to enjoy. Mindless? Shooting zombie after zombie in the head isn't what I would call thought provoking. But the scenes like the one in the sewers where our heroes are being chased by zombies sure is a lot of fun. However, as a horror movie, Dawn of the Dead is a failure. There appears to have been no attempt to create any atmosphere. Other than the scene in the parking garage, I never go that uneasy feeling horror usually produces. The horror that is there is too obvious and lacks subtlety that I find necessary for it to be really effective. Also, as there isn't really much of an attempt to flesh out the characters, it's difficult to care about the predicament they find themselves in.

I've read any number of internet posts on what seems to be an endless debate about fast zombies vs. slow zombies. I actually see advantages and disadvantages to both. I find a slow moving zombie lurking in the shadows to be a far more frightening visage than the Carl Lewis style zombie. On the other hand, the fast moving zombies seem to present more of threat and work better in action sequences. Push come to shove, I suppose I would come down on the side of the slow zombies. The undead in Romero's Night of the Living Dead or Fulci's Zombi 2 work better for me because of their inherent creepiness.

6/10

Night of the Bloody Apes (1969)

- La horripilante bestia humana
"I acted against the dictates of God", 12 May 2006

Night of the Bloody Apes is a bizarre little film. It features: bad acting, a ridiculous storyline, terrible special effects, inane dialogue, Grand Canyon size plot holes, a complete lack of logic, enough padding for two movies, an insane amount of blood and gore, a generous helping of nudity, some truly "unique" camera-work, and female luchadors. I generally hate this term, but it should be easy to see why I consider Night of the Bloody Apes "so bad its good". The movie is so full of excesses and poor taste that it's an absolute blast to watch. Night of the Bloody Apes may be a train wreck of a film, but I can't think of many movies that are this bad yet so fun to watch.

I could go on and on describing moments for Night of the Bloody Apes like the utterly boring masked female wrestling matches or the eye gouging scene that looked like someone was squeezing cottage cheese, but I don't want to "ruin" it for anyone. You need to see this one for yourself.

5/10

The Big Racket (1976)

- Il grande racket
One of the best films of this type I've seen, 12 May 2006

I have now seen quite a few of the Italian crime films made in the 70s. The Big Racket is easily among the better Poliziotteschi I've so far run across. The violent action is non-stop. The film rarely takes a break for the viewer to catch a breath. Fabio Testi stars as Inspector Nico Palmieri, a cop determined to put an end to the protection racket run by a group of local thugs. But the seemingly small time thugs are actually part of a larger group with the goal of spreading their reign of terror to a much larger scale. Nico enlists the aid of a handful of men who have been directly affected by the gang's activities to help him wipe out the entire group of gangsters. But does this small seemingly rag-tag band of misfits stand a chance against a much larger band of killers?

The Big Racket is gritty, violent, sadistic, and nothing is held back. Director Enzo Castellari has crafted some amazing action sequences. The shootouts at the train station and the final battle at the warehouse are some of the better scenes of this type I've seen. And the scene featuring Testi rolling down a hill inside a car is so well done and so realistic that I actually worried about Testi's health. The Big Racket also features a couple of rape scenes that can be difficult to watch, yet they add immensely to the overall feel of the film and supply realistic motivation for the vigilante actions to follow. These scenes are brutal and sadistic and show the depravity these thugs are capable of and why they must be eliminated.

Fabio Testi gives one of his better performances that I've seen in The Big Racket. Unlike The Heroin Busters, where I never bought into Testi's character, he is completely believable in this film. The rest of the main supporting cast is just as good. My favorite supporting performance comes from Orso Maria Guerrini, the marksman who goes mad for vengeance after watching his wife get raped and burned alive. Much of the cast is made up of stunt people who do an adequate job given their limited experiences in front of the camera.

Overall, if you're a Poliziotteschi fan or just a fan of American cop films from the 70s and have never seen an Italian crime film, The Big Racket is a definite must.

8/10