Crossroads (2002)

Painful, 17 February 2008

I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I just finished watching Crossroads. Now, before anyone calls the men in the white suits to come pick me up, I should add that I would have never watched it without the rifftrax commentary. The commentary turned what would have been an experience akin to visiting one of the seven layers of Hell into one of the funniest things I've ever sat through. Hysterical!

The plot, not that it matters, involves recent high school graduate named Lucy (Britney Spears). Together with two other friends, they travel across country, each with a different goal for their trip. Along the way they discover the true meaning of friendship. (Did I just write that? What a load of crap!)

I'm not sure who told Britney Spears she could act, but they should be drummed out of the entertainment industry post-haste. In a word, she's abysmal. Her co-stars don't fair much better, but with a script like this, anyone would look foolish. This thing is just wretched from the word "Go". Crossroads is one painful experience.

1/10

Rose Red (2002) (TV)

"How beautiful you are, Rose Red.", 16 April 2007

Prof. Joyce Reardon teaches psychology and has a particular interest in the psychology of the occult. For her next research project, she intends to take a group of psychics to a local haunted house, Rose Red. The house is known as "dead cell" as it's been years since any reported supernatural activity occurred in Rose Red. It's Prof. Reardon's goal to use her team of psychics to bring the house back to life and gather physical data supporting her theories on the supernatural. But Rose Red is no ordinary haunted house. It's the granddaddy of haunted houses. Over the years, it's been responsible for the deaths or disappearances of dozens of people. What will happen if Prof. Reardon's team is successful in their mission? And will anyone be left to tell their story?

Even for a writer as gifted and talented as Stephen King, coming up with original ideas for a haunted house film is difficult. It seems that every haunted house movie made since 1963 follows the pattern set out by The Haunting. Rose Red is no different – a notorious house with a deadly history, a scientist looking to uncover its mysteries, a group of psychics, etc. So Rose Red gets no bonus points for an original story idea. But its execution is very nicely done. Because Rose Red was originally conceived as a miniseries, there's time to get to know a little something about the characters. It gives a little more substance to the danger they face. This extra time also allows for atmosphere – something that I've argued is missing from a lot of modern horror. The special effects are also quite good. I was especially impressed with some of the lighting, miniature, and matte effects. And the acting is better than I would have expected. Julian Sands has always been a favorite of mine and he does not disappoint here.

The only negative aspects of the film that immediately come to mind are the movie's finale and some ill-placed comedy. The ending of the movie is extremely muddled. I've seen Rose Red three times now and still have trouble deciding just what is behind the haunting (vampire, ghost, or something else). And the comedy featuring Prof. Reardon's colleague Prof. Carl Miller is really out of place given the tone of most of the rest of the movie.

Overall, if you're a fan of haunted house films like The Haunting or The Legend of Hell House, don't let Rose Red's 240 minute runtime put you off. It's about the best "traditional" haunted house movie I can think of from the last 20 years.

7/10

Angel of Death (2002)

- Semana Santa
I don't understand all the hate directed at this movie, 26 March 2006

I'm shocked by all the negative reviews I've read on Angel of Death now that I've seen it. My rating of a 6/10 almost makes me look like a fanboy in comparison with what most people seem to think about Angel of Death. It may not be the best movie ever made, but it's certainly better than the garbage others seem to be labeling it. Take the criticisms I've seen leveled against Mira Sorvino. The charge – Sorvino sleepwalks through her performance. What these people call sleepwalking I tend to view as a nice, understated performance that works for me. It's like the old adage – one man's trash is another man's treasure.

The plot centers on a series of brutal murders being committed during the Spanish Holy Week celebrations in Seville by a red-hooded monk. Through their investigations, Sorvino and her compatriots discover a back-story of rape and greed dating back to the time of the Spanish Civil War. Sorvino must find the killer before she becomes the latest victims. This plot is, perhaps, the movies weakest point. It's interesting enough, but it's far too involved to completely explore in a roughly 90 minute movie. There are a few subplots that go nowhere and much is left to the viewer to figure out.

In many respects, Angel of Death seems to be an attempt to revive or at least revisit the European or Giallo thrillers of the past. A black-gloved hooded killer, a convoluted plot, beautiful cinematography, and violent death scenes all hearken to the glory days of the Euro-thriller. It's a shame this movie wasn't more well received because I would have enjoyed seeing more of this kind of film.

6/10

Dark Water (2002)

- Honogurai mizu no soko kara
Moving and Creepy, 4 January 2006

Dark Water is a truly unique film in that it worked on two different levels with me. First, it worked as a horror movie. No, it's not pee-your-pants scary with buckets of blood. Instead it's just plain old creepy with lots of spooky atmosphere. Even though much of the horror lurks at the periphery, it's a constant, definite presence. And when the horror does spill into the characters everyday lives, it's very effective. Who would have thought that a little girl's Kimiko bag could be so eerie? Second, Dark Water works as a drama. I bought the pain of the mother fighting to keep her child. And I felt the joy as the two played together. And in the end, when the mother realizes what she must do to save her child, I felt the heartbreak of both characters.

The whole thing works because of some great acting. Hitomi Kuroki gives a remarkable performance as the mother. I believed and felt everything she was going through. Most of the Asian films I have seen recently have had good acting, but Kuroki's performance stands above the rest. As for the little girl, she's not the annoying child I'm so used to seeing in films like this. She seems real. It's a nice job by such a young person.

My rating would be higher if it weren't for the predictable nature of what happened to the missing Mitsuko. It's should be apparent to anyone (other than the characters in Dark Water) where the child is and how she died. Still, it's a remarkable ride to an inevitable discovery.

8/10

Ju-on: The Grudge (2002)

Ju-on or The Grudge - Take Your Pick, 30 December 2005

The plot (and almost everything else) of Ju-on is almost identical to that of the American remake, The Grudge. When one of the other social workers doesn't show-up for work, one of the newest workers goes to take his place. When the new social worker arrives at the house, she immediately realizes that something is not quite right. What she doesn't realize is that the house is possessed by spirits who will kill anyone they come into contact with.

Comparisons between the Japanese Ju-on and the American The Grudge are inevitable. Overall, I'm one of the seemingly few who enjoyed the American version more than the original Japanese version. Maybe it's just because I watched The Grudge first, but I really think it goes a little deeper than that. As I mentioned previously, the plots are almost identical so there's really no point in trying to pick a favorite.

Things I preferred about The Grudge - 1. Make-up - I found the more stylized make-up very effective. 2. Flow - As far as non-linear story's go, The Grudge is one of the best examples I've ever seen.

Things I preferred about Ju-on - 1. Simplicity - The lack of a lot of extraneous details makes for a tighter movie. 2. Cast - The fact that Sarah Michelle Gellar isn't in Ju-on is a big plus for me.

Overall, while I may have preferred the American remake, the two movies are actually very close in my mind as far as vehicles of entertainment go.

7/10

Phone (2002)

- Pon
Nice supernatural murder mystery, 28 December 2005

Shortly after popping Phone in the DVD player, my thoughts were, "Oh no. Not another Asian long-haired ghost story". I thought it was going to be the same old thing. Since watching, I've read reviews on the internet that complain about the movie being "derivative" or "unoriginal" (if you want to see derivative and unoriginal, check out Ju-rei). And while I agree to a certain extent, Phone has enough twists and turns in the plot to keep it from being just another "ghost with long hair" story. I see it as a murder mystery with supernatural elements. I'll admit that the mystery had me guessing up to the big reveal and the supernatural stuff had me jumping on more than one occasion. While it's certainly not the best Asian horror movie I've ever seen, I was reasonably entertained after a slow start.

If the current crop of Asian horror has one thing in common, most all of the ones I've seen are technically brilliant. Phone is no exception. The house where most of the story takes place is visually stunning with a load of atmosphere – a real feat in a modern setting. Sound, lighting, locations, special effects, etc. are all what I've come to expect when watching one of these movies.

One area where Phone does not measure up to its Asian brethren is in the acting department. It's not that the performances are bad, but with one exception, no one really stands out. The performances are "workmanlike" at best. The exception is See-woo Eun who plays the little girl, Yeong-ju. And while most of her acting consists of a series of strange faces and growls at the camera, considering her apparent age, it's a solid and memorable performance. Given the subject matter and some of the things she was asked to do, I was impressed.

7/10

The Eye (2002)

- Gin gwai
Excellent horror film with a weak ending, 17 December 2005

Mun (Angelica Lee) is a young woman who has been blind since she was two years old. A cornea replacement surgery offers hope of being able to see. But once Mun's vision is restored, she gets more than she bargained for. She is bombarded with images of places and people that don't quite seem right. Mun sees ghosts. But that's not the worst of it. When presented with a picture of herself, Mun realizes that the image in the picture is not the same woman she sees when she looks in the mirror.

The first half or so of The Eye is an incredibly creepy little film. There are moments like the elevator scene or the first time we see what Mun sees in the mirror that had me sitting on the edge of my seat. It's all very nicely handled. But the film switches its narrative tone about half way through much to its detriment. The Eye goes from being a subtle, effective horror film to being a special effects extravaganza. The Pang Brothers appear to have the same problem ending a movie that a lot of Hollywood filmmakers seem to have – if you can't come up with an ending, blow something up. Had the movie ended when Mun discovered the secret of her new eyes, it would have been a better movie and worthy of a higher rating.

The acting in The Eye is as good as I've seen in a modern Asian horror film. I've only seen Angelica Lee in one other film (Koma), but she's quickly become a real favorite of mine. The two roles I've seen her play are vastly different yet Lee handles each in a believable, very enjoyable way.

While The Eye may not be the best Asian horror film I've seen, the first half makes it more than a worthwhile watch. I'm looking forward to getting a chance to see The Eye 2.

7/10

Halloween: Resurrection (2002)

Halloween and Michael should have died with H2O, 5 October 2005

Why was this movie even made? Hasn't this story been beaten to death? Did we really need another ridiculous installment in the series? Of course the answer to all of these questions is money. Apparently and inexplicably there is still cash to be mined from the Halloween franchise. Too bad. Halloween H2O provided what I thought was the perfect end to Michael Myers.

There are so many negative things I could say about Halloween: Resurrection that I really don't know where to begin. I suppose I'll start with what I found to be the biggest problem – Busta Rhymes. Has there ever been a more annoying person to appear in a horror film? What a horrible performance!

And then there's the whole idea that Michael has been living in a tunnel system under his old house that the police never thought to search. Yeah, right. The whole notion is an insult to the intelligence of any thinking person.

Don't you think that an event like investigating the Myers' house on Halloween night would draw a crowd of onlookers (or at least nut-jobs) from near and far? There's no way Michael should have been able to enter and exit the house unseen. The crowds of the curious, security, or police would have surely noticed something going on. Again, this whole notion is an insult to the intelligence of any thinking person.

Honestly, I could write paragraph after paragraph of what I found wrong with Halloween: Resurrection, but what's the point. It's too easy. I will give the movie credit for one thing – the actors wearing cameras was a nice touch. It's too bad they didn't have anything worth filming.

3/10

Bubba Ho-tep (2002)

Elvis & JFK, 13 February 2005

This movie answers the age old question - what would happen if Elvis were still alive and living in an East Texas nursing home that was under attack from a mummy? It's up to Elvis and his friend, a black man who is convinced he is John F. Kennedy, to save the other residents of the rest home.

Bubba Ho-Tep is billed as a "comedy/horror". While it has it's moments of both comedy and horror, I see it as a very touching drama. While the whole concept of the movie may have a certain camp appeal, it is so much more than that. It's the story of a man who realizes that most of his life has been wasted. It's the story of a man who wonders if his life has any meaning. It's the story of a man who is looking for a reason to live again. And, it's the story of how disposable older people in our culture are. Elvis realizes that if he can save the other residents, he can create something positive in his life before he dies. It is these moments in Bubba Ho-Tep that touched me deeply.

This may have been why I didn't rate the movie higher, though. I was expecting something I could laugh and have a good time with. And while the scenes of Elvis in a wheelchair going face-to-face with a mummy certainly meet this criteria, these scenes are few and far between. Instead, we see Elvis laying in the bed for half the movie, reminiscing about his life. And although interesting, it's not what I was expecting, or hoping for for that matter.

Don't watch Bubba Ho-Tep expecting a laugh a minute or a scare around every corner. But if you want to see a nice examination of one man's struggles as he grows old (mixed with a healthy does of camp), it may be the movie for you.

7/10