The Return of Swamp Thing (1989)

Funny, but little else to recommend, 4 April 2005

The evil Dr. Arcane (Louis Jourdan), thought to be dead at the end of the original Swamp Thing, is alive and well. His life, however, will be short-lived unless he is able to reverse his cell degeneration. Up to this point, his experiments have yielded only horribly disfigured mutants. Fortunately for the Doctor, his step daughter, Abby (Heather Locklear), arrives to confront him about her mothers death. With her DNA, Arcane may be able to save himself. But, lurking nearby is Swamp Thing - Dr. Arcane's nemesis who is intent on stopping him.

I've seen this movie at least a half a dozen times. With each viewing, I want it to be good. Although bits and pieces are enjoyable, overall it's just not a very good movie. For the most part The Return of Swamp Thing fails at being an action movie, it fails at being a sci-fi movie, and it fails at being a horror movie. Some of the acting, particular that of Monique Gabrielle, is noticeably wooden. I doubt that Gabrielle has ever delivered a line that sounded natural. Some of the special effects, particularly a few of the mutants, are anything but special. Many of the plot points can be seen from a mile away. For example, when we are introduced to Abby, we are told that she's the kind of person who prefers plants to people. Gee, I wonder who will be her love interest in the movie?

The movie does achieve a little success, however, at being a comedy. Some of the lines are genuinely funny. For example, when Swamp Thing reminds Abby that their budding relationship will be hampered because he's a plant, her response "That's okay, I'm a vegetarian." Not great, but it does bring a smile to my face. Another scene that I'm fond of involves Jourdan poking a little fun at himself. Jourdan's pet parakeet happens to be named Gigi. Jourdan sings a little song to Gigi that's a take-off of the songs in what may be his most famous movie, Gigi.

As I had seen this movie several times before, on this occasion I watched with the commentary on Image's DVD. Few commentaries are as informative as this one. Listening to Director Wynorski, it's amazing the detail he remembers about making The Return of Swamp Thing. It's one of the better commentaries I've heard in a while.

4/10